I find it difficult to be nice when having a 2-way online conversation. The absence of tone of voice in regular text plays a big part in that. The writer knows what they mean, but the reader doesn't. So most readers try to figure it out for themselves.
There are various suggestions to try and sidestep this problem but those all have their problems.
- "Posh" word choices. Trying to do that drains my brainpower and I really don't understand why people expect it anyway.
- Smilies. Standard on most online forums but not exactly serious and can distract readers from the actual text. But at least they're easy to use and people would understand them.
- Stating what you don't mean. Boring and you can't anticipate every which way your post will be interpreted. It also takes up screen space.
No matter how you try, there's always the risk that someone will misinterpret it in a very bad way. It doesn't help that most people can't stand being targeted, regardless of whether or not your response is an "attack".
Essentially, nice shouldn't even encompass "posh wording", it shouldn't require the use of smilies, and you shouldn't have to keep stating what you don't mean. What matters is that they don't swear at you. Unfortunately, forum administrators can get away with swearing because they are the ones in control and there's no-one governing them.
Say what you think, using R.M.E.S. if you like.
EDIT: Now that I look at it, grey #606060 does look a bit dark to clearly distinguish. Changed to #707070.
